


Rock & Roll, You Crucified Me

by chicafrom3



Category: Lost
Genre: Character Study, Community: over_look, Drugs, Fame, Gen, Grief, Music, Semi-Canonical Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-28
Updated: 2006-07-28
Packaged: 2017-10-18 03:29:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/184499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chicafrom3/pseuds/chicafrom3
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sinjin's life can be defined by "before" and "after".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rock & Roll, You Crucified Me

**Author's Note:**

> over_look table/theme name & number: I, 7 - Before

Before he was Sinjin, he was Adam, and before he played guitar, he liked airplane models. He went to church every Sunday and paid attention in school, and his mother loved to brag about what a fine, upstanding son she had. He played pranks with his best mate Julian, but they never got into serious trouble.

Then he traded his models for a guitar and learned as fast as he could how to play, and learned about music and girls and parties. He let his hair grow out and got tattoos and people started calling him Sinjin. Julian electrocuted himself fixing an amp; he was fine, but from then on everyone called him "Zap", even people who didn't know the origin of the nickname. He played for bands all over the area, earning himself a reputation just as sure as Zap was becoming the area's number-one amateur technician. And his mother wrung her hands and wondered where she'd gone wrong.

Before Sinjin played with Driveshaft, he played with a new band almost every week. He still had his best mate Zap, but no other real friends, since he never stuck around in one place for very long. He was restless and bored and tired of playing for bad garage bands that were never going to leave Manchester.

Then he met Liam Pace, and Liam introduced him to Charlie and Pat, and they screwed around for an afternoon playing a couple songs Charlie had put together, and before they were finished Sinjin knew this was where he belonged. It turned out their band didn't quite have a name yet, but he got drunk with them anyway, and signed Charlie's arm to prove to Pat that he really was interested in signing on with them, and once he was good and smashed called up Zap to see if he'd be interested in a more permanent job. And by the end of a week, Adam "Sinjin" St. John was the lead guitarist for Driveshaft, a band that was Going Places.

Before Driveshaft was famous, Sinjin thought he had never had more fun. Charlie and Liam were brothers, but everybody were mates with each other, and they got drunk together and played good music and enjoyed each other's company. And, of course, there were girls, girls who thought nothing was sexier than a guitarist who could rock out hard onstage. It was always a blast and he wasn't bored.

Then they got a deal with a record label, and _(You All) Everybody_ topped some charts, and then they were touring and there were more girls and drugs and reporters and money. And Liam got moody and Charlie got defensive and Pat got lost, and Sinjin didn't really notice until it was too late to do anything except bail on the sinking ship and resume trying to find a place in the world.

Before Oceanic Flight 815 crashed, Sinjin figured he was immortal. Drugs hadn't brought him down, and neither had fame; he was finding his own music and his own peace, and figuring life out step by step. Driveshaft had brought the four of them to rock bottom, but they had survived and clawed their way back up to real life, so what could destroy them now?

But then a plane crashed and no one found the passengers or even the plane itself, and Charlie was gone. Just like that, Charlie was gone from their lives. Joking, insecure, broken but fighting Charlie just wasn't there anymore, and there wasn't an explanation. And more than a few nights, Sinjin woke up suddenly, terrified that Pat was dead, or Liam, or Zap—because if Charlie could die, that meant none of them were safe.

Before Sinjin understood life, he thought he was happy, and after, he knew he didn't know anything.


End file.
